So I really want a bag of those Rolled Gold Honey Twist Pretzels, or whatever the proper name of them. This has gone on for a few days now. Kind of a slow-burn yearning, never quite loud enough to dash to the supermarket to grab them. It is only 19 degrees fahrenheit right now, so I have reasons and excuses to stay indoors. I have been working a lot and working on Asymptote a lot. That’s where I am. Eleven days ago was my birthday. Two days ago KM, friend and Monkfish Jowls contributor, emailed me. Today Kevin shared with me his secret blog. Tonight I am going to see a lawyer. 

Does anyone else find that when you start to make money, you want to do nothing but? There’s a perverse joy in watching numbers go up and down as bills are paid and deposits are made. But what is the nature of this currency? I see maybe 3% of what I am paid in the form of physical cash. The rest is spent with card swipes and mouse clicks. If I draw out the numbers along an xy axis from week to week can I pretend that they are like the plants that I once grew? Waxing and waning faster, though, I must say than any plant ever could. And how is it that even when I make more and more, I still hit an equilibrium of income and outcome? It all seems like a farce. No wonder those who make a quarter mil. sill feel quite poor. 

I anticipate my numbers will be greener than ever in 2015 given the care and cultivation I’m giving them now. And perhaps they’ll span longer than from week to week. But then again, they want to be spent and after all, what are they?